Splatter

Around 10pm this evening when we were brain dead from powerpoint, I was telling a couple of my colleagues why I quite like the idea of a blog. I know I am late to the party - my geocities page was fully functional in 1998 - yet my blog only happened in 2010. But I have a good reason. For the last decade then I have been debating what do I have to say that the world wants to hear? Its only this last weekend that I realised that actually, it does not matter.

My blog is about mundane things. Things that my friends and loved ones will read and pause with a quiet smile, a memory, then move on and finish slide 29 of their powerpoint or whatever it is they get paid to do. So today's story is about and old memory, an old colleague, an old pitchology compatriot.

Tom was a big bloke - with a booming voice, a personable manner, and rightfully he holds the senior role in industry today that he was destined for. A pity then that all I remember about him is his urinal manner. Tom was a big bloke, and he always stood too far from the urinal, so sure was he of his aim and his force. To this day, while he crafts together his senior industry leading slides, he is probably unaware of how much collateral splatter he leaves on the hands and trouser fronts of his neighbours.

After a round of ciders tonight we rechristened this pillar of industry Tommy Splatter. All the best wherever you are, all the best to your current colleagues.